confidence and focus

Confidence And Focus:

An Unbeatable Pair For Your Mental Toughness (INFOGRAPHIC)

Confidence is King, but Focus is Queen. 

The game of chess is NOT won by moving the king one space at a time. The King is just how the game is lost! 

Chess is won by utilizing the Queen!

Within the hierarchy of mental toughness, we all know the importance of confidence. And yes, there are specific ways to build and enhance one’s confidence, but there is even a better approach to victory than just trying to address the area of confidence

In the classic book by Sun Tzu, The Art of War, it was proposed that the strongest way to beat an opponent in battle is by flanking your opponent. Historical and modern warfare examples support that claim. Flanking your opponent means attacking from the side instead of the front which is where most of the strength of resistance resides.

I was always shocked that in the Civil War, most of the battles seemed to play out as columns of soldiers simply walking and shooting straight at one another. The greatest blunder in the Civil War was the result of a frontal assault in Pickett’s charge. Whereas the greatest victories were claimed by flanking the opponents side.

Our greatest opponent is our own mind.  

Our mind has one role which is to protect itself and it does a masterful job.  However trying to ONLY work on being confident is like a frontal assault in battle. Instead, we need to flank our own mind in order to build Confidence and Focus. 

Within the hierarchy of mental toughness, these two infographics reveal three ways that we build your mental toughness. The mental game is simple, but not easy. Hence, after you check out these visuals, be sure top let us know which skill is harder for you to accomplish?

Confidence and FocusConfidence and focus

1. Confidence = Discipline. If you want to improve your knowledge, add something everyday. If you want improve your wisdom, remove something every day.Lao Tse. Confidence and focus are tied with how we approach our daily disciplines.  1. Challenge vs. Threat- Being nervous or excited result in the same physiological response. When we view events as threats and something bad can happen, we get nervous. When we view events or people as a challenge, then we get excited. 
2. Remove Comparison- Comparison is the thief of joy. But, we all do it. Here are three healthy ways to use comparison to improve. A reminder is that it’s not who gets there 1st, but who can get there and STAY there.  2. Train yourself, don’t test yourself- Too often instead of training your mental toughness, you end up testing yourself. This slight difference in mental approach allows you more room for mistakes and learning.
3. Let nothing bother you- Only when you can let nothing bother you, does it reflect your true level of confidence and belief that you have in yourself.  3. W.I.N. – What’s Important Now? This skill is directly connected with your confidence and focus and your mental toughness.



dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 



how to become more patient

“Patience is not an absence of action. It is a purposeful choice to wait.” – Salman Ahktar

Here Are Four Fast Skills On How To Become More Patient 

1. Acceptance 

2. Hope

3. Absence of Resentment 

4. Ability To Wait 

how to become more patient

How To Achieve Patience



Check out our new book: 

I Can’t Wait To Be Patient  


The mental game and mental toughness is more about subtraction than it is addition. Removing anger, frustration, fear, and/or annoyances from our daily lives is difficult. However, doing so also improves our disposition, grit, and attitude.

More importantly, when we learn how to become more patient, it also builds up one’s capacity to handle and endure future disappointment, rejection, and failure.


  • Acceptance 

Ask yourself this question, “does more pain come from letting go or resisting?”

Acceptance of things and people as they are is difficult.

It’s why we all get stuck. Not many of us want to accept that we get older, for instance.

Not many accept being wrong or changing their mind. Few want to accept death and heartache as part of life. Few want to accept that life is not fair. It is painful to lose material possessions, friends, jobs, houses, money, championships, etc.

It’s even worse and more difficult to accept when we are cheated or swindled.

Acceptance of change in our life is difficult. Our goals change, our kids change, our finances change, our relationships change, etc. But since time is the only constant, our view and actions within time need to change as well.



  • Hope

Confidence is patience.

When the greats in any field know that they have what it takes and are confident in their own process, it provides a level of assurance for a better future.

Confidence means they have an attitude of “when” not “if” the results will manifest.

Confidence and patience work in tandem. When we are confident, we are able to have more patience. And when we are patient, it allows us to be confident.

That is why HOPE is a source of how to become more patient.

When we have patience with the product, it grants us perspective with the process.

When we “can’t wait” and force or manipulate a situation or person, it also reveals our own level of confidence and patience.

We need to be urgent with the process, but patient with the results.

improving your patience

  • Absence of Resentment 

An absence of resentment means we have to examine our role in any given situation. We can’t change the outcome or other people without understanding our own insecurities and baggage in a situation.

It starts with us.

To possess an absence of resentment means to approach people, situations, and especially ourselves with patience.

If we have resentment toward ourselves for a past setback, then we will develop resentment towards others.

It’s a simple formula of “arrows in” also means “arrows out.”

Hurt people will hurt other people because the cycle of resentment is so powerful.

If we don’t transform our past pain, then we will transmit it to others closest to us.

In order to be patient, we must develop an absence of resentment towards others and ourselves. When we do this, time again begins to work in our favor and removes that hurt we held onto.


skill #4 ability to wait

  • Ability To Wait 

The ability to wait without haste or restlessness seems to be the core concept of how to become more patient. It’s what I am probably worst at. 

We feel like we can’t slow down, because we perceive everything as urgent.

The crux of patience is that we have become urgent toward the un-important. Our emotions and mood tell us that it is important in the short-term, but with time, the urgent cannot be coupled with the unimportant.

We don’t wait. We scroll…

We delete emails, mindlessly scroll social sites, text others, post videos, etc.

When we awake in the morning, we are often at odds with our own sense of urgency. And this sense of urgency is usually toward the unimportant.

Patience won’t always win it for you, but if you don’t have patience, it will lose it for you.


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

Personally, I dislike hacks!

I think of a bad golfer when I hear the word, HACK. 
I don’t want to be a hack or peddle hacks around. I also dislike the term because a hack seems like an easy way out, a cop out, rather than a campaign to get better.

And getting better is indeed a campaign!

But, hacks can make life easier, if we implement them. So, yes, this infographic is a hack, because it’s the simplest thing to alter the way we feel. 

When we feel a certain way and want to stop it, then we need to change our environment.

We can act our way into right thinking easier than thinking our way into right acting. 

Want to change the way you feel, change your environment. 

Here’s an example about the power of our environment. The reason why you should never have exercise equipment in your bedroom, is because that’s not what the bedroom is for. It’ll sit there, reminding you, causing stress about why you don’t use it. 

​​When it comes to changing how we feel about work or our team, the environment matters! 
As Lou Holtz stated​​, “create an environment where you are missed if you’re absent.” 

However, during a pandemic, changing our situation often became a difficult thing to do. We were stuck. So, when thinking of changing how we feel about ourselves, it isn’t always about getting away or sitting on a beach (although, that’s great).

Tweaking our environment can mean altering anything for the betterour office, our routines, sprucing up the yard, connecting with others, or even driving new routes home. The power of our relationships becomes the everlasting gobstopper to our overall purpose and satisfaction in life. 

Changing your environment will help your focus, grant you perspective and rejuvenate how we feel about ourselves.

It doesn’t replace doing the internal head work. But, if used in moderation, it is a way to gain momentum!  

want to change the way you feel, Change your environment

Remember, you’re an athlete, our offices are just different.

You are responsible for the culture and training mentality that you set. 

Want To Change The Way You Feel, Change Your Environment.


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

lessons from the last dance

lessons from the last dance

10 Lasting Lessons From The Last Dance Documentary

“Winning and leadership has a price!”

During the pandemic, one of the bright spots took place on Sunday evenings and watching the 5 weeks worth of the killer documentary. It was cool being able to show my kids why MJ was the best. 

If you want some more life lessons from basketball movies, check out 7 Life Lessons from the Movie HOOSIERS. 

If you want to watch the best mental toughness documentaries, click here. Top 10 Mental Toughness documentaries. 

1. Your why must make you cry

Michael Jordan tears up at the end of an episode, saying, “break.” He was caught up thinking about how much he cherished and desired winning. You’ll cry either because of how much it hurts, or because of how much effort goes into it. We all have the Pain of discipline or pain of regret. 

The last dance documentary also showed us all how fleeting success really is… The process is what matters most. 

2.  You’re not good enough

Even the greatest of all-time was ignored, dissed, and slighted. He used it as motivation to prove himself right and others wrong.

It is actually necessary in order to achieve your best. #pukeandrally

3.  Next level dedication

Episode 3, Jordan told UNC Asst. Coach Roy Williams, that he “wanted to be the best.” Coach replied, “You’ll have to work much harder.”

MJ said he worked just as hard as anyone else. Coach replied,  “Wait, you said you wanted to be the best!” He ended up working harder…See #8. Patience was also required! 

4. Be confident

“We will win Game 7!”

Confidence is contagious and when true belief is there, nothing can stop a team with it. Jordan also didn’t think about missing a shot that he had yet to take. This is probably the biggest lasting lesson from the last dance documentary. 

5. Coaching others

Coach Phil Jackson treated every player differently! He was a master at being able to build a bond and trust with players and thus got the most out of everyone. 

That is why he was the most successful NBA coach. 

If you want to build trust with your own team, check out this infographic! 


10 lasting lessons from the last dance documentary

6. On losing

It’s not about the setback! After the Bulls lost to the Magic in the 1995 playoffs, Jordan told his strength coach, “See you in the morning.”

He immediately returned to training. This is the obsession it takes for greatness…

7. “Reboundability”

It’s about the comeback!

Jordan still missed shots, free throws, and had the ball stolen. But, what made him the greatest was that he always bounced back.

ALWAYS! That is what truly make him elite! 

8. No light-switch mentality

No one trained harder or was more competitive in practice than Jordan.

“Michael Jordan was the only player that could turn it on and turn it off… And he never frickin’ turned it off.” – Roy Williams 

9. Stand up for yourself

Steve Kerr once got into with Jordan in practice and they punched each other. He was feared by most, but once Kerr stood up for himself, he got MJ’s respect. 

10. Don’t eat pizza at 10:30pm in Salt Lake City. 

This lasting lesson from the last dance documentary revealed who Jordan actually was as a competitor. 

This was a great documentary- Check out our list of the top ten mental toughness documentaries. 


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 


respond don't react

5 Ways to Respond to Adversity

I’ve written six SEVEN books on mental toughness and in NO FEAR: A Simple Guide to Mental Toughness, the concept of respond, don‘t react was a huge component of mental toughness.

NO FEAR is an acronym for Mental Toughness and strength. I often speak about mental toughness is simple, but it’s just not easy. 

I was caddying in a professional PGA Tour event and I caused my golfer a two-shot penalty. My golfer was the one who was able to respond to adversity and the situation and didn’t react.

Think of a reactor, and you get a vision of a nuclear power plant or a chemical bond. A reactor is someone who can’t keep his or her cool under pressure. Picture a responder on the other hand, and you get a first responder, someone who has been trained to handle adversity.

We need to be a responder, not a reactor.

When we respond to setbacks, it is devoid of emotion and we usually make good decisions. However, when we react, it is full of emotion and many careers and mistakes have occurred due to a bad reaction.

Adversity is sneaky, it shows up when we are most vulnerable. Just remember that life isn’t fair and you don’t need it to be in order to overcome!

Use these five tactics to respond to adversity. 

1. Breathe and Remain Calm. 
2. Walk Away.
3. Make a Play. 
4. Use a Time-Out.
5. Slow Down!
  1. Breathe and remain calm– Nothing good is achieved when we overreact or panic. Choking in sport means thinking too much, but panic is not thinking at all. 
  2. Walk Away- Do not make any immediate replies to email or texts or posts when upset or angry. 
  3. Make a Play- Channel your frustration into the next play. USE that energy! 
  4. Use a Time-Out- Allow yourself some time to ease the frustration, and re-focus on the solution, become a problem solver. This is the best way to slow down.
  5. Slow Down- Everything appears to speed up after a mistake. When under pressure, be sure to walk slowly, talk slowly, and eat slowly

These are the five ways you can respond to adversity and not react. Here is an amazing infographic! 

My ultimate mental toughness strength is not in this skill.

In fact, I write about it extensively, because I’m poor at it and strive to improve upon it all the time. 

5 ways to respond to adversity



dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

super bowl champions

super bowl champions

7 Awesome Facts of Super Bowl Champions

The Super Bowl may not represent the two overall best teams of the season, however, it does represent the two teams that played the best. The nature of upsets and playoffs allow anything to happen, which is why we love it. 

The margin between winning and losing is so very close that Hinge moments from every season, decide the champion.  

The reactions and responses from champions vary greatly as well, and they aren’t always what you think.

For example, which Super Bowl Champions quarterback thought to himself during the celebration, “Is that it?”

Which head coach, immediately after winning the Super Bowl, was in the locker room, but now felt like an outsider?

Interesting facts and themes also emerge from the championship seasons.

For instance, for twelve separate seasons, the back-up quarterback became the starting QB for a significant amount of playing time. For three straight seasons, 1999-2001, the back-up QB actually became the winning QB.

Many teams had themes (e.g., Pound the Rock- 2002 Ravens), a rallying cry (e.g., Whatever it Takes- 1975 Steelers), or a symbolic gesture (e.g., Fun Bunch- 1982 Redskins, Mile High Salute- 1997 Broncos) that emerged throughout the season.

Several Super Bowl Champions also had special identities for units on their teams (e.g., The Expendables- 1973 Dolphins, The Zero Club- 1977 Cowboys, The Hogs- 1982 Redskins).

However, there is ONLY ONE common thread that existed across Super Bowl-winning seasons. If interested in learning about what every super bowl champion possessed, check out the .99 e-book here. 

7 awesopme facts of super bowl champions


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 



What is Mental Toughness 

There are way too many definitions of what is psychological strength. And I’m talking published research definitions. It seemed to be such a sexy term, that scholars just ran with creating their own meaning.

But, I am a wash and wear kind of guy, I keep it very simple.

But, it does take a genius to keep it simple. 

I simply continue to use Jim Loehr’s definition. (Performing well under pressure and how we cope with adversity, 1986). 

In my podcast- 15 Minutes of Mental Toughness,

I ask every expert on my show- what is mental toughness to you? 

I value how these tough people define strength and more importantly, how they exhibit it in life. SO FAR, I’ve interviewed two different stroke victims, 19 professional athletes, 5 professional strength coaches, two amazing women that ran 383 miles, ultra-endurance athletes,  8 personal development coaches, and 8 successful entrepreneurs. 

Please check out the podcast, subscribe if you will, and leave a review!

Experts define What is Mental Toughness

dr rob bell

Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & Associates is based in Indianapolis.  Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books.   

Please check out the podcast 15 Minutes of Mental Toughness as we interview expert athletes and coaches about Mental Strength and their Hinge Moment.

(INFOGRAPHIC) 8 Deadly Ways to Build Persistence

Every morning, I tweet out the same phrase:

Patience & Persistence…

It’s a mantra.

A belief system.

Perseverance, Mental Toughness, and Grit are all muscles. Every muscle can be built and trained. Thus, we all can build persistence and we can increase our patience. 

The ways we build persistence is just like building creativity, speed, and strength.  You increase the perseverance muscle by exercising the very traits detailed within this infographic. 

The simple reason why this title has “deadly” in it, is that in order to increase persistence, we must fail, fail, and fail some more. It becomes PUKE & RALLY

Losing and failure sure feel deadly, but just remember failure is NOT fatal. These are the ways to build persistence!

Thanks for sharing this post about mental toughness and hope you’ll check out our other posts like this one... What happens when you prove yourself right?

ways to build persistence


  1. Fail   – Mental Toughness is caught more than it is taught. How can you really build perseverance if you’ve never failed? 
  2. Focus – Each day, you can have one or two major goals or accomplishments to achieve, everything else is a distraction. 
  3. Patience – I can’t wait to be patient is my next book. It’s a virtue. 
  4. Develop a Routine – An A.M. routine is powerful. The first hour of the day sets the rudder for the rest. My morning consists of running and writing. These are the ways to build persistence. 
  5. Time Off – What do we do when our computer has a glitch? That’s right, reboot. We are the same way, plan to have deliberate breaks and time-off to re-charge. If you don’t take scheduled breaks then you’ll have un-scheduled time off. 
  6. Make it a PriorityMental Toughness doesn’t just happen. It has to be the main priority for that day. If you make it a priority, then it can done, because it’s inside of your control. 
  7.  Focus on the process – A focus on winning doesn’t lead to winning, a focus on the process does. Besides, the process is more important than the product. 


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

Ways to act as if

[Infographic] 7 Helpful Ways to “Act As if” Toward Mental Toughness

I absolutely can’t stand the saying ” fake it until you make it.” Why do you want to fake anything in life on purpose, especially to yourself?

It’s almost as bad as S.M.A.R.T. Goals! 

We already fake it enough.

We have social media profiles of our happy faces. We posture and become in the business not of being real, but of image management. So, please don’t fake it. 

Of course, I do like the saying, “don’t fake it until you make it, FACE IT, until you make it”… 

Instead, here are ways to act as if.

The difference is that acting your way into right thinking is easier than trying to think your way into right acting. It takes commitment, mental toughness, and often a coach. 

Here is a fun infographic for you to follow to act as if you’re mentally tough.

Of course, Patience is needed as well…

ways to act as if


dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 


5 ways to crush some's confidence

5 Ways To CRUSH Someone’s Confidence (Do This INSTEAD)

This infographic was designed specifically for parents because I hate it when I accidentally crush my own kids’ confidence. 

But, below is good advice if you’re a coach as well.

Unfortunately, if you are a Lex Luther type of person who just wants to kill someone’s confidence, then do some work on yourself. 

I clearly remember my senior year of baseball when I made an error at shortstop. It was a hard-hit ground ball that simply jumped and hit me in the chest and I didn’t make the play.

I wasn’t that upset about it because it was a bad hop. But, when I got back to the dugout and coach called everyone together, he verbally challenged me if I could even play that position.

“Um, yes sir.” 


Now, I was never a great hitter, but I worked tons on fielding and felt I was a great short-stop.

But that feedback from the coach, in front of everyone, made me question everything and wonder if I really could play that position.

I deliver keynotes and talk about to this day. 

  1. Call out someone in front of their peers, that’ll crush someone’s confidence.

That experience and feedback stayed with me and frankly, I played like crap the entire year at shortstop. 

I don’t blame coach, I just didn’t have the mental toughness tools. I didn’t know how to bounce-back and not let that outside stuff bother me.  I didn’t know how to properly let go of mistakes.

It sucked and I wish I could go back and give that high-school kid some advice. 

It is easier to crush someone’s confidence than it is to build it up.

Confidence is contagious…

Perhaps this infographic can help.

Here’s the five ways:

1. ONLY tell them what they did WRONG. 
2. ASK, “are you nervous?” 
3. Tell them, ” It’s all mental.” 
4. Talk openly about other players, coaches, rankings, and winning. 
5. Blame the coaches! 

crush someone's confidence



dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes. Some clients have included three different winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens.