Posts

The Toxic “At Least” Mentality |

at least mentality

The Toxic At Least Mentality

I have bad days, I get down.

I lose belief and I’ll feel like I am not good enough.

I also have days where I do well, but for many reasons, I just didn’t perform up to my own standards.

I don’t like feeling like this way, so what occurs when I get like this is I develop the toxic at least mentality.

  • “OH WELL” At least, I ran today
  • “AT LEAST” I am not as slow as that person
  • “AT LEAST” I showed up
  • “OH WELL” at least, we played well

What I am really saying to myself is at least mentality that I am not a loser…

But, I am also saying, I am not a winner…

The “at least” mental state is dangerous and systemic. Once it enters our vocabulary either within ourselves or our team, it can easily seep into our core beliefs.

The “at least” attitude means we chose to make an excuse. 

Settling was okay.  Mediocre wasn’t all that bad.

Going through the motions became an option. We chose to live inside the comfort zone. I basically valued my self worth as a “maybe” rather than a “yes.”

The toughest part of winning is the will to prepare.  

Committing to everything that is needed to win, means developing a winner’s mindset as opposed to an “at least” mind-set.  We must instill the belief that we deserve what we are going to achieve because of our preparation, because at no point did we settle.

However, what lacks is the belief…We develop an at least mentality because we wanted, we just weren’t willing… We weren’t really willing to sacrifice, willing to develop the needed focus, or willing to work on our weaknesses. We looked around us and said “I’m not all THAT bad.”

Preparation and motivation involves the belief in oneself and that our goal or vision can be reached!

Setbacks, adversity, and struggle are going to happen, but it is how we overcome these obstacles.

The bottom line is that losing happens way more than winning ever does.

There is always a runner-up finish, a 2nd place team, and second best in show.

The question must be asked,  is an at least mentality an acceptable option for you?

 

dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes and is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included three winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

Please Check out all the books and the mental toughness podcast - 15 Minutes of Mental Toughness as we interview expert athletes and coaches about Mental Strength and their Hinge Moment. New blog posts are published weekly. 

/by

Shocking Ways That Goals NOT Deals Will Improve Your Mental Toughness

make goals not deals

Shocking Ways That Goals NOT Deals Will Improve Your Mental Toughness

Click here to receive a FREE FILM On Mental Toughness

At the 1964 Olympics in Tokyo, Billy Mills would make history with his iconic sprint to win the gold medal in the 10,000 meters. He was so unknown, that a Japanese reporter asked him after his win “who are you?”

He is still the last American to win the Gold medal in the 10,000 meters.

However, he was actually going to quit.

Before the last lap, he knew he had third place locked up, so he was going to pull up and let the battle be decided by the other two runners, Ron Clarke and Mohammed Gammoudi.

He knew it was “safe” to pull up, but as he looked into the stands, he saw his wife crying… He couldn’t give up on his goal, NO DEAL!

A runner/cyclist friend of mine was a great athlete who admitted that he could just “show up.” He was skilled enough to compete in basically anything he did.

However, he told me that his game changed once he set goals not deals with himself.

Mental Toughness is all about how we handle, cope, and deal with adversity. Our own mind gets in the way of this, especially when life gets really tough. 

During a race or competition, he used to say to himself, “Keep up with [that guy] until this point and then let him go.” He admitted he wasn’t as sharp as he needed to be mentally. Now, during a race or practice, he’ll set goals, he’ll just say, “Catch that guy.”

Why There is Only One Reason That Destroys Your Fitness Goals

Three reasons why SMART goals are stupid

Use this Top Gun Technique for Goals

Make Goals NOT Deals

The one way to FAIL at your goals

Three ways professional athletes crush their dreams.

How often do you make deals instead of goals? 

  • With our children, “Honey, if you pick up your toys, you can get a snack.”
  • With God, “lord, if you get me through this, I will never…”
  • With ourselves, “If you [do this] then you can [do this].”

Making deals is just like a coach who uses sprints as the only means of discipline.

Making deals is just like a coach who uses sprints as the only means of discipline.

Click To Tweet

It works, but only for a short while, and the athletes soon grow to tolerate it, and not learn from it. Making deals is effective, but only for the short-term. It gets the job done, but it is not sustainable and it causes really bad habits.

When we make deals, we are limiting how good we can become.

Deals do not build mental toughness.

Our motivation and focus has changed. We are doing something to gain an immediate result, not long-term success. Making deals also gives us an “out”, a reason not to push further when it gets really tough. When we make goals not deals, it means there is a higher purpose and why behind our actions  and we start to win the mental game. 

Goals not deals means having a plan of action without a fallback.

It’s stating, “I will do this”, instead of  “do this, so you can.” It means keeping the focus on the immediate task at hand instead of focusing on the outcome.

Athletes don’t train for the trophy; they train for the feeling of holding the trophy. It’s not for external reasons or rewards either, it’s for the self-satisfaction.  

“Good athletes practice until they get it right, great one’s practice until they can’t get it wrong.”

 

dr rob bell speakerDr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates coach executives and professional athletes and is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included three winners on the PGA Tour, Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. 

Please Check out all the books and the mental toughness podcast - 15 Minutes of Mental Toughness as we interview expert athletes and coaches about Mental Strength and their Hinge Moment. New blog posts are published weekly. 

/by