A participation trophy does not build mental toughnessย
FOX 59 interviewed meโฆย click on the image above to watch the storyโฆ
Kids are not to blame. We are.
We’ve become obsessed not with their own medals, but our own. We run a 5k and expect a medal. A coach even told me a runner who didn’t even run, wanted their finisher medal for a 5k!
Trophiesย donโt mean anything. ย Many Olympians have their Gold medals in a sock drawer. We are the one’sย who give meaning to the trophy and what it represents.
Olympians didnโt participate for a medal, it was not the driver.ย They wanted to test themselves against the best. Their own mental toughness and talent are the reasons for their success.
When we give kids a participation trophy, it is more about the adults than it is the kids. Check out our article on the most costly mistake that ย Sport Parents make
I doubt if even one kid ever began toย play sports because they thought,ย โHey,ย I get a trophy at the end.โ They play for the fun, and the Capri Sun.ย
Awarding a participation trophyย actually can do more harm than good.ย
We think that providing an external reward for hard work will build motivation, but the opposite may be the case. It may diminish their motivation. Is it a reason why 80% of kids stop playing by age 14?
Not sure.
Yale researcher, Amy Wrzesniewski examined the motives ofย over 11,000ย West Pointย cadets across the span of 14 years.
Theyย wanted to assess theย impact of cadetsย โwhyโ for entering the academy. Cadets that had internal motivators were more likely to graduate, receive promotions, commissions, and stay in the military. Cadets thatย entered with BOTH strong internalย andย external motivatorsย (such as get a good job later in life)ย revealedย drastically less success.
The external factors such as get a better job and make more money had aย negativeย impactย on overall success.
Think about it, we all have different internal motivators and are more likely to accomplish a task when we tap into our ownย โwhyโย rather than a carrot or stickย approach. ย (i.e., I find a wallet-ย Iโll return theย wallet because itโs the right thing to do, rather than the possible reward I could get.)ย
Adults donโt need to give a participation trophy to kids, they just need praise their effort and allow themย to have fun and also fail.
We donโt make everyone a winner by making everyone not a loser. It may even create more losers.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates isย based in Indianapolis. ย Some clients have included: University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out the most recent book on Mental Toughness-ย Donโt Should on Your Kids: Build Their Mental Toughness ย ย
